12 Comments
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ash's avatar

truly think people should read this before rushing into their relationship and making their whole life surrounded by their partner. you said it, and i'll repeat it again, "Your relationship should add to your life, but not be your life."

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Ciara ★'s avatar

Thank you Ash! Agree completely 👏

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Unpacking this in therapy…'s avatar

I love this actually. The realism of it all. A relationship should not be a solution to be happy. It should only make you happier. You lived life without them, during them and after them. Life goes on. Just hopefully you find someone to do life with. All of it. The taxes. House hunting. Being able to miss them, thats a honor. I can’t miss you if I’m with you all the time. I need my space, as they need theirs. We merge when we want. I love that.

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Ciara ★'s avatar

Wow this is a beautiful comment! I love the “you live life without them, during them, and after them” - I think I kind of forgot that. Thank you for such a wonderful comment 💌

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Jessica Alice's avatar

This is so lovely. I second your list of lessons learned :)

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Ciara ★'s avatar

Thank you Jessica!

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Anjali Krishnakumar's avatar

I relate with a loot of this!! When you’re with someone best, they bring out your whole potential!! Also the fact that love comes to you, when you’re ready and least expecting!Every single time. The more you worry about it, the longer maybe you’ll have to wait. Beautiful share, Ciara!! <3

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Ciara ★'s avatar

Thank you so much! 💓

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Becky Butler's avatar

I feel like I just read a piece written by myself!! This was incredible! Each of those lessons that you’ve written has been scrawled across pages in my diary over the past year of my first relationship! Seeing someone else write those words is so incredible comforting. Thank you for sharing this it meant more than you know!

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Ciara ★'s avatar

Aw Becky, thank you so much, and it's nice to hear that you feel the same way! 🫶

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Ella's avatar

Ciara this was gorge. And big claps for Fletcher for convincing you to start Substack!! 👏🏻

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Ciara ★'s avatar

Thank you Ella!! Haha yes I didn’t know about Substack at all so I don’t think I would have discovered it! Glad he told me 💓

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