20 life secrets that elevate my every day
saying no - Saying no to things that don’t serve me is so important for my well-being. I used to be quite afraid to say no to almost everything. Now, I am so proud that I can say those two little letters with confidence and courage. Don’t get me wrong, it’s something that has taken me some time to master, especially as I’m a people pleaser and worry about how people will feel or react. My younger self would be proud of me.
gardening - my mum has always been a gardener. She has spent a lot of her time pottering around in the garden, kneeling on a knee pad, and carefully planting new blooms into the ground. My grandma was the same. I find comfort that I will follow in her footsteps throughout my life. I’m currently germinating a bunch of sweet peas and feel a little joy inside of me each morning checking to see any changes. I cannot wait to see my sweet peas bloom!
baking bread - there’s something about the smell of bread dough, holding it in my hands, and shaping it. All whilst looking after it, as it proves. It just makes me feel so grounded. I love making fresh bread to pair with conversations over a pasta dinner. Focaccia is my favourite, and I recently made a successful sourdough using my own sourdough starter! (It took me a while to get there, but the reward is so worth it, knowing it’s all handmade from scratch)
keeping a diary - I don’t know about you, but I have a little fear inside of me that I will forget important moments in my life. Not only that, but the tiny details of how those moments made me feel. Re-reading a diary is like watching a cinema screening of my own life. I don’t write every single day of my life, just the events or the moments I want to remember. It’s nice to know that I have stories to read back when I’m older, or on a rainy day when I’m bored, or to show to my kids in the future.
minimal makeup - I love a simple makeup routine that gives me a dewy ‘no-makeup-makeup’ look. Just a few cult classic products, using my finger tips or a brush to blend, that I can apply in a hurry to feel more put together. I use concealer under the eyes, a little bronzer, a cheek stain to bring back some colour, powder, and mascara.
a go-to perfume - when I was in school, I used to only wear the ‘lovely’ perfume by sarah jessica parker. Do they even sell this anymore!? It was my signature scent and I liked having that as ‘my-scent’ - if you get what I mean. I certainly have wayy too many perfumes now, so I’m always switching up my fragrance each day. But my go-to fragrance is by A.N Other. It is simply gorgeous!
deleting tiktok - 3 years free from TikTok over here and best decision ever. No explanation is needed really.
no pressure weekend - I’m always pensive about what to do on the weekends, and when I don’t know what to do, I feel a bit down. But rather than let that get to me, I think of some simple activities I could do to make me feel like I’ve achieved something in my day. This could be baking a cake, cooking, doing some gardening or walking around in my local area.
changing fomo for jomo - I sound like a computer right now, but hold on. FOMO stands for fear of missing out. A gut-renching feeling brought on by myself because I would be saying yes to events I did not want to go to at all. Solely due to a fear of being left out, left behind, or missing out. Now, I’d rather accept my ‘fate’, if you will, of missing out and transform it into JOMO. The joys of missing out! Love this phrase. It’s a perspective shift to just sink into the feeling of ‘missing out’ but in a good way. So, embracing the moment to do something for myself, like watching a film, writing, or baking, means I have fun in my own company and feel the relief of not having to go to that dreaded event.
digital camera + printing the photos after the trip - I’ve only started this recently, but it made my trip away so much more special now that I have a bunch of physical photos to look back on. Plus, they look so much more beautiful than an iPhone shot. There’s something so much more realistic and lifelike about a digital camera photo over an iPhone picture. Also, I’ll never have to worry about losing the photos due to storage issues or the cloud (whatever that is).
a good pair of pyjama bottoms - I’m not a one-piece organised pyjama person. I lose them somehow, just like how socks go missing in the wash. I have three different T-shirts with three different bottoms. None of them match. But having a nice pair of pyjama bottoms is key. It goes with a white T-shirt so it never goes wrong. I have a stripey pink pair of textured cotton pyjama bottoms from Mango, and I love slipping into them after a long day post-shower.
quality over quantity - Investing in good quality pieces is something that has changed the game for me and my wardrobe. Previously, I would buy what was most affordable. But this meant that after a few washes, a jumper would become bobbled, look old, and worn out. Saving up for a good quality jumper with good material properties is a great investment because it lasts longer, I love it more, and it looks more expensive because of the quality.
quality over quantity (friend edition) - I used to want more friends. Until I realised that more friends usually (for me) meant less connection. It meant feeling more alone or left out. I value the quality of a friendship much more than the number of friends I have. So, 1, 2 or 3 good friends are more special than a whole group of friends that make you feel alone.
merino wool layers - I live in the countryside, so walking on Dartmoor is a habit on my weekends. I would layer jumper upon jumper and still find myself getting a chill, until I discovered Merino wool. It keeps you warm and acts as an extra skin layer, keeping the cold out! You can sometimes get some Merino wool tops quite cheaply, so keep an eye out for sales online!
try hobbies - I used to be fearful of trying new things. Walking into a room, not knowing anybody, and having to get to grips with what you’re learning? Nope. But, last year I tried everything and anything I wanted to. I just signed up and put myself out there. It filled up my cup! I tried a pottery course, yoga, the gym, rock climbing, and ballet. Read my latest article for some more advice about finding your hobbies here.
selling clothes I haven’t worn in a year rule - A good way to decide whether to sell my clothes is by asking myself ‘has this piece seen the light of day in a year?’ if the answer is nope then it needs to go. If I’m not wearing it at all throughout one year, then what is it sitting in my wardrobe for?! Sell it to a good home instead and earn some extra cash.
sending pictures of what I’ve been up to with friends via text - Sometimes we don’t bother asking our friends what they’ve been up to because we can just find the answer on their Bereal, Instagram story, or Facebook etc. We don’t even need to bother asking because we’ve seen that they’ve been to a concert and that they’ve had a good time. I love sending a photo dump of photos to my best friend when I’m away and chatting about what we’ve been up to. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
liz earle face cleanser - IRREPLACEABLE HOLY GRAIL. Been using this cleanser since I was about 12, thanks to my Mum who uses it too - she loves Liz Earle more than me. Smells divine, removes makeup, and makes my skin feel so baby-soft and clean.
having an ‘out the door’ outfit - You know those days where you don’t know what to wear and just stand at your wardrobe stalling? Having an outfit that you can just pick up, put on, and dash out the door is a lifesaver in these moments. It’s great for cooking too. If you have nice clothes on and don’t want to get cooking smells infused into it, put your ‘out the door’ outfit on. Multi-purpose!
do the things that scare you - I wrote a post on this a while back regarding how I felt about doing something out of my comfort zone. I was so nervous and slightly dreaded the trip away. Yet, once I got there, I was so glad I said ‘yes’. So glad I pushed myself out of my comfort zone. All of those nervous feelings just passed. It made me realise you can say yes to the things that make you scared and those positive feelings might just arrive later along the way. Read all about it here.
*Please feel free to comment below your little secrets in life… I want to hear them! Do you have any go-to rituals you perform? Have a no-exception routine in your day. Let’s hear it!
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Deleting tiktok!!!!!! I’m 6 months sober. Best decision ever
I love this and how applicable the secrets are to every day life!! I’m also trying to focus on printing photos. Do you have a camera you love and would recommend?